A Promise to Patsy

The past year has been a heartbreaking ride, one that teaches you what is important and what is not. It has taken me a year to be able to type. Even now, I type through tears of frustration and a myriad of feelings.


A year ago, my MIL came home for Florida in time for a fabulous Easter celebration. Soon after, she was plagued with the "flu" and couldn't shake it. She was so sick she missed cherub 3's First Communion which sent alarm bells ringing in my heart. She loved the cherubs more than the shells on Cape Cod's finest beaches and wild horses couldn't keep her away. Something was really wrong. During hubby's 40th bday surprise weekend (with friends) she soldiered on to try to help FIL and SIL babysit the cherubs. Less than a week later found herself in the hospital. Having received a kidney tranplant 9 years prior, hubby and I thought kidney failure? Was it her heart??


Cancer.
Lung.
Stage 4.
Devastation.


Being the ultimate fighter that she was, she tried to fight. God had other plans. She peacefully passed August 1, 2011 surrounded by her family. I have been mad furious at God ever since.


I know I should feel joy that she is with God now. I do not. I feel sad. Mad. Confused. I try to rationalize. She is not sick anymore, she is in heaven. She is an angel that can be with the cherubs in a different way. Even knowing this, I.am.still.mad. I am not sure when I will not be mad. I will keep trying.


We love you and miss you everyday Patsy, Grammy, Mom! xoxo


In Patsy's Memory-We Promise


We promise to keep you with us everywhere
We promise to cook and live with spice
We promise to learn how things work
We promise to dance around the living room
We promise to have pj pool parties
We promise to not overthink things
We promise to question everything
We promise to have an opinion
We promise to love the grand cherubs
We promise to be a good friend
We promise to take care of and love each other
We promise to live each day to the fullest.